Oh That Devil Within

Oh that demon inside. Do you make yourself known? When the switch flips south and light exits the room you attack my thoughts without mercy. Your resolve and will is perfect. You drive your ambitions deep into my soul. And there I lay, the monster within playing around within me like a wrecking ball. You exist in all of my doubt about life and tear me apart the more that I attempt to run from you.

But I am going to fight no longer, only to eagerly embrace your presence. Does this bemuse you? Does this make you weep at the thought of the grip you once had that exists no longer? You held onto me so perfect and so tight due to my disability to see that the battle increased your strength. Like quicksand I sunk the more I moved. But like I claimed before, I embrace the darkness now.

Things have changed. I will see clearly now that darkness can deliver light. There's no fear in this heart anymore regarding you showing up. Why? Because… you are here…right here deep inside of me. Not walled out from me any longer. Not pushed away. Just here with me. Present. Really present.

I am truly aware of what you now are and who you turned me into. No, I’m not making an attempt to fool any person any more by showing them a fake smile on my face. No, I will just be myself. So I tip my cap to you to all the times you cut me down. Now, let’s take a hike and work this thing out. I would like to hear what you say about all of the years of the past. How proud are you? How much fun did you have? Are you pleased with your success? Maybe I can even clap to your success?

But we are moving on and this is the birth of a long relationship. It’s going to be difficult, but I’m going to start speaking with you for the 1st time. But now, my decisions are based on light. It’s really time to begin to live my life and make the best choices I can. But I know that I must consult with you…oh harsh devil within. You can show me an untraveled path that is worth exploring in of its own. You can show me places I have always been scared to go. But to ignore you further would be out of ignorance. Shame. Fear.

So let’s take a hike. I want to hear what you have got to say.

Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement a website dedicated to spreading encouraging words to everyone who visits and giving them a reason to continue chasing after their dreams. If you are stuck in a rough place, perhaps dealing with that devil within right now, please read these quotes about depression. They will help. A lot.

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